Sacred Scripture and the Sacred Tradition of the Church teach that Christian marriage is a lifelong, exclusive, and fruitful covenant between a man and a woman that reflects the bond between Christ and his Church.
The Sacrament of Matrimony joins a baptized man and a baptized woman in a covenant for life. It is by God's own design that marriage is permanent and exclusive, for the Book of Genesis describes how our first parents were created in the state of marriage. Christ cited Genesis to affirm that marriage is meant to be a lifelong and faithful union, and he raised natural marriage to the dignity of a Sacrament between a baptized man and woman (cf. CIC 1055 §1; cf. GS 48). (Cf. CCC 1303, 1611,1638)
In the Western Church the man and woman themselves are considered the ministers of the Sacrament of Matrimony. In giving their mutual consent with the Church—represented by her minister, a deacon, priest, or bishop—as their witness, they confer the sacramental graces upon their union. These graces enable them to share the same self-sacrificing love of Christ and his Bride, the Church, an image described by St. Paul. Specifically, matrimonial grace strengthens the couple for the challenges of marital life, especially regarding the education and formation of children. Moreover, Matrimony confers graces to grow in holiness and charity in a spirit of forgiveness, patience, and service. (Cf. CCC 1603,1617,1620,1642)
Marriage is ordered toward the good of the couple. A husband and a wife in a Christian marriage are to help sanctify one another so each may one day receive eternal life. It is also ordered to the begetting and formation of children, the fruits of marriage. Sexual intimacy, which must always be reserved for the bond of marriage, serves to express and unify the love of the couple and must remain open to the conception of children, "the supreme gift of marriage." (Cf. CCC 1652,2201, 2225)
A valid sacramental marriage cannot be dissolved. Only when an investigation by the competent ecclesiastical tribunal reveals that validity was lacking can the Church declare a marriage null; this annulment is not akin to divorce, which claims to end a marriage, but rather a statement that a valid union never existed. (Cf. CCC 1629, 2382-2386)
-The Didache Bible
Sacred Scripture begins with the creation and union of man and woman
and ends with “the wedding feast of the Lamb” (Revelation 19:7, 9). Scripture often refers to marriage, its origin and purpose, the meaning God gave to it, and its renewal in the covenant made by Jesus with his Church.
God created man and woman out of love and commanded them to
imitate his love in their relations with each other. Man and woman were
created for each other.
“It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a suitable partner for him.... The two of them become one body.”
Genesis 2:18; 24
Woman and man are equal in human dignity, and in marriage both are united in an unbreakable bond.
-United States Catholic Catechism for Adults
On the threshold of his public life Jesus performs his first sign—at his mother's request—during a wedding feast. The Church attaches great importance to Jesus' presence at the wedding at Cana. She sees in it the confirmation of the goodness of marriage and the proclamation that thenceforth marriage will be an efficacious sign of Christ's presence.
In his preaching, Jesus unequivocally taught the original meaning of the union of man and woman as the Creator willed it from the beginning: permission given by Moses to divorce one's wife was a concession to the hardness of hearts. The matrimonial union of man and woman is indissoluble: God himself has determined it: "what therefore God has joined together, let no man put asunder."
-Catechism of the Catholic Church, nos. 1613-1614
There are attempts by some in contemporary society to change the definition or understanding of what exactly constitutes marriage. Efforts to gain approval for and acceptance of samesex unions as marriages are examples. While the Church clearly teaches that discrimination against any group of people is wrong, efforts to make cohabitation, domestic partnerships, same-sex unions, and polygamous unions equal to marriage are misguided and also wrong.
The Church and her members need to continue to be a strong and clear voice in protecting an understanding of marriage, which is rooted in natural law and revealed in God's law.
-United States Catholic Catechism for Adults
The first effect of the Sacrament of Matrimony is the gift of the bond between the spouses. “The consent by which the spouses mutually give and receive one another is sealed by God himself” (CCC, no. 1639). “The marriage bond has been established by God himself in such a way that a marriage concluded and consummated between baptized persons
can never be dissolved” (CCC, no. 1640).
The grace of this Sacrament perfects the love of husband and wife, binds them together in fidelity, and helps them welcome and care for children. Christ is the source of this grace and he dwells with the spouses to strengthen their covenant promises, to bear each other’s burdens with forgiveness and kindness, and to experience ahead of time the “wedding
feast of the Lamb” (Revelation 19:9).
-United States Catholic Catechism for Adults
The Sacrament of Matrimony is a sacred promise, by which a man and a woman establish between themselves a life long partnership whose purpose is the good of the spouses and procreation and education of offspring (children) .
Your decision to be married in the Catholic Church is an important one. In doing so you proclaim to the Christian community and to God your love for one another. Being married in the Catholic Church is a public celebration. You ask for and are guaranteed the prayers and support of the Christian community. Through the publication of banns in our weekly bulletin, the parish will know of your upcoming wedding.
To be married in the Catholic Church implies you understand marriage is a sacrament, a gift of God’s love, blessing, and presence. Because your marriage is a sacrament, you and the parish share the responsibility of sacramental preparation. That is why you participate in a Pre-Marriage Inventory (FOCCUS) and a Marriage Preparation Program (Pre-Cana) as well as scheduled meetings with the priest or Marriage Preparation Couple working with you. We will help you prepare for receiving the Sacrament of Matrimony.
As you prepare for marriage, we urge you to worship together, regularly, participating in Mass and praying together, asking God to bless you both and keep you free from worry, full of happiness and anticipation before your wedding.
We want your wedding to be beautiful, memorable and meaningful. Don’t hesitate to talk to us about what we can do to make it so.
May God bless you in your marriage.
Fr. Anthony
Pastor of Saint Boniface Catholic Church
In her teaching, the Church gives us a picture of family life that begins with the total gift of love between the spouses evidenced in their resolve to remain exclusively faithful until death. This promise, made before God in the midst of family and friends before an authorized priest or deacon, is supported by the continuing presence of Christ in the life of the spouses as he pours into their hearts the gift of love through the Holy Spirit. The couple does not walk alone and possesses the graced freedom to respond to all natural and supernatural help.
The couple’s joyful acceptance of children includes the responsibility to serve as models of Christian commitment for their children and helps them grow in wisdom and grace. In this way, their family becomes a “domestic church.” The family honors the home as a place of prayer that conveys a sense of the sacred where so much of Christian life occurs.
The couple needs to remember they have entered a relationship between persons. They come to one another with two loves, the one commanded by Jesus and the one caused by their attraction to each other. They are challenged to unite their personal love with Christ’s love.
Their human love will survive more effectively the cultural challenges they face, as well as the psychological and economic ones, when it is
merged with the powerful love of Christ, who wants them to succeed
and whose divine grace is ever at their service.
The New Testament shows that Christ’s command to love is the
door to the whole supernatural order. At the same time, it encourages
the couple to know that Jesus affirms the human good of each person.
Together the couple must seek the same goals of mutual love united to
Christ’s love, the raising of a family and the continued growth of their
own relationship.
It can seem difficult, or even impossible, to bind oneself for life to another human being. This makes it all the more important to proclaim the Good News that God loves us with a definitive and irrevocable love, that married couple share in this love, that it supports and sustains them, and that by their own faithfulness they can be witnesses to God’s faithful love. Spouses who with God’s grace give this witness, often in very difficult conditions, deserve the gratitude and support of the ecclesial community. (CCC, no. 1648)
-United States Catholic Catechism for Adults
Almighty and eternal God,
your fatherly tenderness never ceases to provide for our needs.
We ask you to bestow on this family and this home the riches of your blessing.
With the gift of grace, sanctify those who live here,
so that, faithful to your commandments,
they will care for each other, ennoble this world by their lives,
and reach the home you have prepared for them in heaven.
We ask this through Christ our Lord. Amen.
The following resources will help couples reflect on the gift marriage is to our Church and our country, as well as an opportunity for couples to build up their own marriages.
Helping married couples to deepen conjugal love and achieve responsible parenthood is part of the Church's total pastoral ministry to Catholic spouses. Fulfillment of this ministry includes both education and pastoral care. This means "instilling conviction and offering practical help to those who wish to live out their parenthood in a truly responsible way" (Familiaris consortio, 35).
LEARN MORE about Natural Family Planning at United States Conference of Catholic Bishops
God designed marriage as an "intimate partnership of life and love" (see Gaudium et spes, no. 48). In God's design, marriage is a unique union of one man with one woman "for the whole of life" (see Canon 1055, The Code of Canon Law). Marriage is oriented to the good of the spouses and to the creation and nurture of new human life (see Gaudium et spes, no. 48). Making decisions therefore, about when and how many children to have in marriage is a sacred responsibility that God has entrusted to husband and wife. This is the foundation of what the Church calls, "Responsible Parenthood," the call to discern God's will for your marriage while respecting His design for life and love.
The Catholic Church supports the methods of Natural Family Planning (NFP) because they respect God's design for married love. In fact, NFP represents the only authentic approach to family planning available to husbands and wives because these methods can be used to both attempt or avoid pregnancy.
Jesus gave us the Sacraments to call us to worship God, to build up the Church, to deepen our faith, to show us how to pray, to connect us with the living Tradition of the Church, and to sanctify us. – United States Catholic Catechism for Adults